Born This Way

No, I am not particularly a Lady Gaga fan, but I felt that the song title fit this post. Whether you are gay, straight, or introverted, I think there is something to be taken from the lyrics of Gaga's song: "'There's nothing wrong with loving who you are'" and "I'm beautiful in my way/'Cause God makes no mistakes/I'm on the right track, baby/I was born this way."

So, as you may have guessed, here's the question for today: Are introverts born with the "introvert" gene or does our environment teach/make us to be introverted--or both?

Looking to my past, if you were to ask my mom, she remembers me as a loud, easily stimulated baby. As stated by The Introvert Mind, it turns out that babies, like me, who react like this and are not "placid and content," typically grow up to be introverts. The easily agitated babies, much like introvert adults, "are more stimulated by the environment than their extraverted brethren, and react more strongly to it." So, according to this finding, I was most likely born this way.

But, then again, as a little munchkin, I remember quite fondly of the times spent running amok, bossing people around, and basically just being a big know-it-all. But as I've gotten older, I've lost the spunk I used to have. I don't boss people around or yell at the top of my lungs to get an important point across... So, what happened? Was I an introverted baby who turned into an extroverted toddler who turned into an introverted teen?

According to The Introvert Mind, "Studies on twins have shown that about half our chance of being introverted is inherited from our parents, whereas the other half comes from our environment growing up.  It would seem that we inherit not introversion, but a proclivity towards it, and that even a child born from an extroverted line may, in the right circumstances, discover their inner introvert as they grow up." This explanation doesn't expound on how I transitioned from introvert to extrovert to introvert. However, I won't disregard this; I am probably just not a prime example for this explanation.


In the book Quiet by Susan Cain, the factors of introversion is described: "A heritability rate of 50 percent doesn't necessarily mean that my introversion is 50 percent inherited form my parents, or that half of the difference in extroversion between my best friend and me is genetic. One hundred percent of my introversion might come from genes, or none at all--or more likely some unfathomable combination of genes and experience." I would assume that this statement is fairly accurate--as far as accuracy is concerned. Each and every introvert is a combination of the genes they acquired and the experiences they've encountered.

“So stay true to your own nature. If you like to do things in a slow and steady way, don't let others make you feel as if you have to race. If you enjoy depth, don't force yourself to seek breadth. If you prefer single-tasking to multi-tasking, stick to your guns. Being relatively unmoved by rewards gives you the incalculable power to go your own way.” Susan Cain

Intro to Introversion

"Introverts living under the Extroversion Ideal are like women in a man's world, discounted because of a trait that goes to the core of who they are. Extroversion is an enormously appealing personality style, but we've turned it into an oppressive standard to which most of us feel we must conform." Susan Cain

Yes. I am an introvert. Throughout my life, I have been stigmatized by my natural characteristics. People have called me "weird"and "too quiet". Soon, I began to believe it. It really took a toll on my self-esteem. Everything around me told me that I should strive to be extroverted like everybody else. If I magically became extroverted, I would be happy, have lots of fun and a ton of friends. Frankly, I don't feel that introversion is nearly as bad as its portrayed. I never realized the power of introverts. Introverts balance out extroverts.  Throughout these next few weeks of a deeper look into introversion, I want to address different aspects of introversion and hope to impart how to feel empowered by a much-maligned trait. To begin my research, I feel it's necessary to first simply define introversion.

Before we get any further, I just wanted to clarify that I was, in fact, an introvert. So I took the Quiet Quiz and found out that I am a Moderate Introvert, but I was just one point away from being an Ambivert. So, in some ways, I may think and act like an introvert, but at other times, I may be neutral like an ambivert. For example, when I go to a party, I don't go with intentions to make new friends and am somewhat shy if I am introduced to an unfamiliar person. However, if I am just out-and-about on a casual Sunday and begin conversing with a stranger, I am not always so timid and quiet. I would like to point out, though, that my reaction to a certain situation can rely on many factors; I cannot tell definitely how I would react to any situation depending on that certain day.

Now that I self-identify more on the introverted side of the introversion/extroversion spectrum, I wanted a generic definition of what introversion is exactly. According to About.com, "Introversion is one of the major personality traits identified in many theories of personality. People who are introverted tend to be inward turning, or focused more on internal thoughts, feelings and moods rather than seeking out external stimulation." Merriam-Webster's definition is "the state of or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life." And as much as I don't want to admit these definitions are true, they are. I don't want to acknowledge that I am primarily focused on myself and don't seek external stimulus because I still feel like it is bad to be introverted, but I can't deny it any longer.

So, with that, come and join me in my journey of self-acceptance.